Toenail polish on my wall

Now I am a freak and I am proud to proclaim such skill sets and bedroom prowess just as I do my cooking and parenting skills. In addition, I am not one to hold my tongue and have no reservation about saying exactly what I feel and mean at anytime, regardless of the company. Now yesterday I was out side of my shop lounging. It was a pretty 84 degree ATL day. The sun was out and not a semblance of a cloud was in the sky. Had a nice 2004 New Zealand Shiraz. So I’m lounging and beveraging, playing South African House Music and this car comes past and blows, I wave thinking its one of my customers. The car turns around and parks. Out of the car gets two women. And one had a dog – which was a turn on. So I show them the shop, they say all the right shit like “I like your store” and “it’s cute.” So I offer them some grape and they accept. A lil while latter another young lady drives up and joins us.

No as we continue to beverage, I notice that the sun has brought out all of their toes. As I look around, all the toes from the bubble gum pink, to the ice blue to the Sunkist orange seem to be calling my name. The conversation went a little like this:

ME: Dang, yawl got some pretty feet, look yummy.

They laugh and blush.

ME: Let me touch them so I can get a closer look

They all oblige

ME: Very rare three women at the same time, all have toes that I can imagine in my mouth.

BUBBLEGUM PINK: So you have a foot fetish?

ME: No maam, the only fetish I have is a Vaginal fetish

They laughed.

SUNKIST ORANGE: That’s not a fetish.

ME: Why not, I mean I am addicted to vagina, or should I say A-dicked.

They laughed again and I continued. “

ME: But I do like a pretty painted set of toes and believe me you, aint nothing like having one in my mouth as I arch a woman’s legs towards the sun and roto-root that azz.”

ICE BLUE: Boy you wild.

ME: I’m for real, ‘cause aint nothing like my shoulders pressed against the back part of your calf as I stroke you into submission, leaving your toe nail polish on the flat white paint of my wall above my headboard. Scared say you scared.

SUNKIST ORANGE: I aint scared

ME: All yawl scared, or else yawl would accept my invite and give me your number. I’d have all yawl polish on my wall, like the gay rainbow.

They all laughed and I poured more vino in their cups.

Strange thing is that they stayed outside with me for the next 3 or 4 hours, laughing and having fun and you guessed it – calling me wild. So They all gave me their numbers and I gave them mine. Strange thing is that they all called me that night. Go figure.