4 peanut butter

As many of you may know, family is essential and likely the most important part of my existence on this planet as a human being. As such, I have been blessed through action, word and deed to have amassed a corpus of advice, stimulation and knowledge from my relatives, in particular my elders, especially my grand parents.

As a single parent it is essential I feel to have a bond with others. As a man, I think this bond is maximized in a single dedicated relationship with a woman. Now true, I aint had one in a while and my disposition may evince otherwise but it remains true.

It in my mind is the greatest tandem, the most valuable partnership, especially if we walk side by side and act as if it is us against the world. For such a mutual disposition announces trust, honest and dependability first and foremost above all and promotes the family, collectively – hers and mine.

Now I know the man I am is not an individual accomplishment, but rather the accomplishment of not only the men in my family, but also my aunts, mother and grand mothers and even in the case on my first and only wife – her and her mother a sisters. It just seems today that finding women as such, women who would rather give than take, women who place the family over self, women who care more about the home than those that succumb to external, and often contradictory outside influences are a dying breed. Women that assisted to make me had no concern about what others thought, they did not think of themselves as an individual and such needs and desires as being more important than they mean – no they were not selfish. The thought of events as we as opposed to I and me or my.

I think that this is dead, for it is more important for some to think of their goals in isolation, albeit they may be dependent on a man, than the equity espoused as a union. It is as if what one would desire individually, does not even proffer thought in concert with another. I say this to give my folks, the women in my family props, for my grand mother said and told me a lot of things. One I have said before is “that if you a ditch digger, be the best ditch digger and they will always call Torrance to dig that ditch.” But another was about relationships and she would just say “for peanut butter.” Her logic was that if we had to eat peanut butter, I will be with my man for love is like that. Anything else will only destroy a relationship if it is not based on love. So I want a woman who can get down with “for peanut butter.” And given such, I have just two choices. 1] Wait and not be involved with women at all (which aint my nature) or 2] bone and disown until I find the one I want to keep for ever.

busted

Jones, you know my granny Hazel died the prior week. And being such, folks seem to come out the wood works, in respect. A good thing, 99% of the time.

An additional disclaimer, I am a reformed Memphis mac, meaning that at one point in time, I ascribed to the “bone and disown” school of thought. Yes i was foul, but that was before I manned up to life and mutual respect for all, especially women. Check this, one of the past histories was a riend, female in gender. We said hello, that she said sorry about my granny’s death and said:

"You remember when I walked in on you and that BROAD in that Bar?"

I instantly went back in my head and said "yes."

What had happened was that we were dating. I think we were even informing one another of out love for each other. I had spoken with her earlier and informed her that I would call her back after I finished using the bathroom, but I did not. Truth was that I had spoken to another women before her and had planned to meet her at the bar. While there with her, the other young lady called twice and I intentionally did not take her calls.

Lord behold, if she did not walk into the bar a few minutes latter to pick up some food. Ironic thing is that the bar was a place that she had introduced me too in the first place. The woman I was with introduced herself to her. She was humble and did not make a scene and proceeded to take a seat at a booth in the corner as she waited for her food. I left the bar and with and set with her for a few. We spoke briefly but she didn't say much, except for to ask me to by her a drink. I made up some excuse, walking off and didn't honor her request.

After my date, I attempted to call her, but she didn't return my calls. I could not blame her, I mean before that time she trusted me. Although I understood then, now I really do understand. I did not apologize then and selected to blame her instead for coming by a lace she always stopped by.

I could not have meant what I said if I would do such a thing. I felt bad and I was busted. I tried to blame it on her, but the truth was i was the wrong one. Saying I was in a relationship with her, and meeting another woman, even if she was my friend, at a bar, and ignoring her calls. As a man, I should have just answered her call out of respect, and told her what I was doing, but I was a coward, a liar, and just tried to hide it from her. No matter what I said then she responded, "the eyes don't lie" and that "if it walks like a duck, looks like a duck, and talks like a duck, chance are it is a duck."

So now Im looking in her eyes and I say, "you were right, I was wrong and it was disrespectful."

So ladies and gents, tell me how bad was what I did, albet plus some 10 years ago, and was she right to not to call me anymore and did I get what I deserve. I guess I am asking, what whould u have done if u walked in on your partner, mate, girlfriend, boyfriend, man, woman, or lover, having drinks with another, when they intentiojnally ignored your calls, and how would you perceive such a person. In hindsight, she was a great person, and would have done anything for me.

But she obviously never forgot, should she have?

SHOUTS OUT 2 TROMBONE SHORTY DURING START OF ALL STAR - YEA I LOOKED AT THE GAME AND I AM EMBARRASED TO SAY SO, BUT IT WAS A GOOD GAME