note to goons, thugs and gangsters

Now I did write commentary on the current administrations health care reform. But I will let the pundits speak before I do because when I speak first it seems they only recant in an adumbrated and unintelligible form, what I postulate. So for the time being, they will have to go at their analysis on their own. Nor did I post on being black in America for I need no TV show that I would never watch anyway to tell me what such a disposition defines. With that said, I will talk about what I love, my kids and family and will chastise those that don’t see the value in such as being major in their lives.

To the aforementioned which I cited in this title, I would like to say that you are foul, fake and lame. Albeit I can contrive a bevy of phrases to continue my description, I will refrain and attempt to convey a logical course of explanation as to why I purport such a locution.
At time I feel as if I am the last man, the last scholar, the last father on earth. And Times have not been easy for me ever. From my upbringing in Memphis, to securing my PhD, to starting my own business, to raising my kids. No never, and I shall not seek the easy way out for hard work compassion and love is all that I crave to mandate my personal exhilaration. But no matter what, I have had two vehicles to assist me my mind and the love of my kids. Even with the grief that has been exerted through my daughters mother who suffers from mental illness, I have never felt alone or helpless. Always I have still had the love of my kids and they have seen me as father first and man second. When my shop was beasted, by my side that morning were my son and daughter who felt more pain and violation than I did, for the door only cost 600.00 and the cash register they stole only contained two rolls of pennies.
See for me there is nothing better than keeping my seeds by my side and wouldn’t have it any other way. Just seems today those that claim to men are of a completely different feather.

For to me, you are a lame if you spend more time in clubs and bars than helping your kids with their homework weekly. Or if the example of fatherhood to you means having your elementary school aged daughter on stage at some awards show while you sing about fucking every girl in the world and staying strapped. To me you a lame if you spend $12 to 17 stacks in a strip club yet can only manage to give a $1000 scholarship – Yea Jeezy, I’m talking to you.
I am proud to say that for me, life is more than hypocrisy and the spouting of fake stupidity related to self material idolization or the proclamation of being hard. For truth be told most folk that do are really soft as wet toilet paper. Yes, I am, proud, for coaching my son in baseball and basketball all of his life and seeing him score in the top 92 percent of all kids in the nation on his ACT. I am proud of the way he man’s up and takes his 4 year old sister to the bakery across the street to get cake when he would prefer not to be bothered with her. Yes I am proud of how my daughter pretends to order dog food on her play phone and answers my shop phone by saying “Braincell.”

This is what makes me feel like a man. This is what gives me pride. I just wish other men felt the same way, evinced pride in family, intellect and their seeds as they do in being foul and hard and for lack of a better word – stupid. I mean who else or what type of person would be proud to proclaim themselves as a goon, thug or a gangster before a man and a father? I say a fool.

i want the pink one

A woman told me recently, you don’t mess with a daddy’s girl. It made me smile and the simper was so warm that folk here could have burnt the sun. I was hoping she was right and in my optimism got even warmer.

Maybe that why she is the way she is. Why she reaches out for me while in her mother’s embrace, or why when she sees me gazelle like, she jumps in my arms. Or why every times she pretends her phone rings she answers “Brain cell; or sit down with her toy laptop on her legs telling me she ordering dogfood too. Yep, maybe, in the rambunctious recalcitrance she gleams, I just smile and say yes or ok.

So I guess I got the best of both world, guess my sperm work like that. First Born is my number one son. Fellas, gotta get you one of them. Second born, baby girl, fellas you gotta get you one of them too.

Especially the latter, I mean the way she crawls on me, lays her head on my shoulder when she is my arms, even how she sleeps in my lap – can u say the bomb. And I really love it when she say “naw folk, we don’t get down like that” or “nothing jones” or “that’s my song.” So fellas, I don’t know what gives. I mean love your kids, I don’t care if they momma crazy or you crazy. Nurture that spirit which has originated from your loin for love sake, and make no excuse and let no obstacle get in your way for doing such.

Cause if u true, learn to live the love in the experience of buying your baby girl cupcakes with pink icing just because she say “I want the pink ones.” I guess money and the economy aint everything. vote

The scorn of Lady Macbeth

remember muzk u hear is jones here mane, all live impromptu funktry muzk

Addendum: They done raised the price of the AJC to 75 cents. Bought one for 50 cents tuesday from the machine-dang.

It has been said that love is a many splendid thing. This can be no truer than with respect to the love a parent has for their child. But sometimes we can be so selfish that we place our desires and even misery over ourselves to the point where we could care less about the wants, needs, and desires of our children. Which means selfishness and hate can be more powerful and of value for some than love.

I heard a popular female radio commentator say on the air, that she used to tell her child that her father did not want to see them and that he did not love them. In the same sentence she said that told the child that because it made her feel better and gave her the fortitude to justify her keeping the child from seeing and bonding with her father. And the reason, because she did not like him and that their relationship did not work out. It was during the weekend of Father’s day when I heard this. At the end; she said she regretted it for as her child got older and learned, she despised her and that, she sawthe hurt she had caused "her baby."

It made me think. I mean not to use myself, but I have been told by a woman that she would take our child, and the reason she gave was that it would hurt both of us. She smiled when she said this. I ignored it saying no woman would use a child as a pawn and desire to hurt their child, using a child’s love with their father as a weapon. I must add at that time, I did fill out legitimization papers, for if such a day came I would be ready; so if I had to fill for custody, I would be prepared and it would be joint custody, for no matter how I feel about the other, her love and parental rights toward our child would be just as important and equally respected and valued in my eyes.

I often wondered how any person; any parent would deny a child the love of the other parent. It is some of the dumbest and most selfish shit I have ever heard. Up there with weapons of mass destruction and reminds of William Shakespeare’s play Macbeth.

All Lady Macbeth cared about was herself and the idea of being Queen, but at the same time, she despised her husband for his kindness as king. In her heart, he was not evil enough, as she was to be King. She even called him a coward for being just and kind and loving and stated that she had no pity and would even kill her own baby as it suckled at her breast, if she needed to please herself.

So is it true? Is there any justification for a woman to use a child to get back at a person for a failed relationship? Especially if the requirements of love and provision are provided for the child? I would suspect in some case the said woman may even be provided for by the father, but still may lack consideration for the child desire and love of that parent.

I would suggest that a person that does not has no love or concern for their child, especially if the child is not being abused or neglected. That if they did, they would desire for their child’s happiness to come first, in particular if the child had a strong bond with the father. But I also feel that women who grow up in homes with the father present would not do such, for they would have learned the value and love that a father or any parent would give under optimal circumstance. I also feel that women that do not have such in the home do not see the importance of a man in the lives of children and may even be the type to say they don’t need a man. I think that such is what is wrong with our communities and leads young women to think their value is only in their looks and sex, or worse, that they can only make a living by turning tricks or stripping in front of some rapper.

Yep, we men do neglect our fatherly responsibility at times and that’s something I have written about a lot. But not all of us. So ladies you tell me, why is it that some folks cannot live with the reality that a relationship is over, or why is it that the selfishness of an individual can over ride the love a child may have for each parent. Is scorn that much of value that, one would scar a child just to hurt another and make themselves feel good?