Friday, May 09, 2008

u are the earth

The hardest job in the world, next to being committed to ones definition or view or belief in God is being a parent. Yep its tough. As such, I think that there is no greater love than the love one receives from their mother. Maybe I say this because I did not have a father in my life. Or maybe because what she showed me allowed for me to understand that it was ok for a man to be passionate, humble, confident and appreciative of all that he had even if they had nothing. I remember as a little child, in Castalia Heights (CTO), sitting at that red little table in that cramped little kitchen in that two bedroom apartment that my mother, her older sister and my grandmother and I lived in, eating what they called milktoast (toast with cinnamon and sugar with a little butter crunched up in a bowl of milk). She was the one who was most proud of me, not when i got my PHD but when she got me a set of encyclopedias when i was 11 and i read them from A to Z that summer. She taught me that if you wanted to hide something from a nigger, put it a book and that if i was a ditch digger, be the best, for they will always call Torrance to dig that ditch. No matter what or when, even until we moved to our house (all of us when I was four) between she and my grand mother, she made sure that I had what I needed to be secure and comfortable.

She was the one who brought me comic books everyday from work at St. Joseph Hospital as the only Black Chief dietician in the city of Memphis, and the first for a major hospital. She was the one who brought me test tubes and lab equipment from other black men who did such at the hospital and got them to let me sit in on their test and experiments when I was in grade school. She was the one who told me that they Brought Martin Luther King Jr to her hospital in a Wonder Bread truck so folks wouldn’t try to mutilate his body. It was these women who taught me how to treat and value a woman, even if they could not do the same - talking about character.

Yep, a mom’s love. You mother’s are the shit. You never place yourself or anything above your children and family. I would give yawl all flowers, so just take this pic of the Verbena growing in my yard as a token of my respect for you all - yep folk here grow flowers. No, you are not baby momma’s just as I am not a baby daddy. You give us the precious intricacies in a cellular form that become children. You bless us with the ability to maintain a pleasant disposition in torrid times. Yes you give us life for you are the Earth, just as mother nature is the earth

So I just wanted to take this chance to toast to you, my breakfast of champions, tequila with a shot of hot sauce in honor of yawl. I have got my mom and last grandmother living cards today. For me and my kids. I have gotten both of my kids mother cards and gifts, although my son’s mom has never given me a fathers day card nor Christmas gift since we went our separate ways, and my daughters mother would not even call me last year on fathers day to let her daughter wish me such while I was in Quebec City, Quebec. But that is neither here nor there for they gave me the greatest gifts any man can cherish. Which means I will be indebted to them always.

They do not dictate what is great and that which should be cherished buy one who came from a mother, no, such is concomitant of my heart and respect and appreciation for the gifts they gave me that hold and hug and kiss and laugh with me; that call me pappa. The are mother's an can never be worthy of anything less as such. So happy mother’s day (especially to momma, granny, Fallon, Sue, Aunt Cecelia, Aunt Trevor,my cousin Monique, my uncle's wife phylis, aunt joyce, grandma Pee wee, Momma-D, and Angie). I love you all.

45 comments:

PrettyBlack said...

Thanks Good doctor. You have the right idea about Motherhood. Parents in gemeral have a tough job when they are doing it right.

I appreciate the thought, and the flowers smell wonderful ;-)

sista gp said...

Thanks...great read to start off this special weekend.
Tomorrow will be a stormy day in GA, but peace in our celebrations.

What else is blooming in your gardens? Maybe I need to take a drive up to the ATL so you can hookup a sista. lol

Happy Mother's Day to you too!

J*Shy said...

Thank you for the Mothers day love! I definitely feel you on the mommi thing! Its definitely a hard job being a parent. I don't know what I would do without my son! He is my everything, and don't worry I will send you some Fathers Day Love!

JayBee said...

mothers who play the role that has been defined in the script are to be cherished. so glad mine did.

Lisa C said...

Your Mother sounds like a beautiful lady. She did a great job with you and your kids are benefiting from that. Great post, Torrance.

Aly Cat 121 said...

awwww . . . what a wonderful post. I love verbena, the scent of it. *smile*

Tera said...

Thanks Torrance, and I think that was an awesome tribute! You are right, Mothers are the best. And even though a lot of my life was spent with my grandmother (whom I love and miss dearly) due to my mother's drug addiction, I still always loved her with all my heart---and still do (of course now she's sober).

My children mean EVERYTHING to me...and I have to give 1000% because their fathers are not around...but I'm sure with their mother's (and of course their grandmothers) love, they will be okay.

Thanks again...what a special read on a sunny Saturday morning!

VE said...

I thought the hardest job in the world was working over at the diaper cleaning place...Ok, well, moms have it tough too I guess.

M. Raye Turner (aka L-Boogie) said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
M. Raye Turner (aka L-Boogie) said...

What a sweet post - I once thought motherhood was the most thankless job in the world...
until i realized it was the only job that mattered even if my spoiled kids took it all for granted... i heard when they get older that they will think the way you do! I'm yet holdin on!!!

Theresa said...

Thanks for leaving an automated message on my blog. I feel good now.

nywele said...

beautiful entry! In which field did you get your Phd? any advises for the newbies? I am in my first semester of Phd...

what else do you have in your garden? I loooooove flowers!! Verbena are beautiful!

Miriam said...

That was so sweet!!!! Yay for your mom and all moms out there!!!

Fenix said...

A wonderful tribute to mothers. Continue to make yours proud.

ViolentLove said...

I love any ppl promoting the feminine qualities of joy, love, tenderness and self sacrifice on a path of true knowledge derived from the spiritual heart.

The spiritual rebirth of the individual is not unlike the trial and tribulation of physical childbirth.

We can take the principle of divine love and use it to facilitate the process of alchemical transformation from earthly human to spiritual being.

Peace unto all the mama's. Be blessed, my friend.

Sheena said...

Thanks for this post. I'm new to motherhood and I am loving every bit of it. It's nice to see more fathers being passionate about their children. Your mother raised you well :-).

tAnYeTTa said...

What a very beautifully written post. Thank you for the mother's day wishes!

You were raised from really amazing women. So glad to see you praising them here as well.

As far as your kids' mothers, I hope they'll come around one day to allow your children to call and acknowledge you on Father's Day as well.

Have a great weekend!

Mizrepresent said...

Beautiful post T -

I am so thankful for my children, so proud to be their mother, so thankful for a loving mother...a legacy that i know will carry on.

Theresa said...

What are you talking about? What does Kaffir boy have to do with anything? maybe you thing I'm someone else...

Marcus LANGFORD said...

I can't wait to have kids man!

:::Marcus LANGFORD:::

Blah Blah Blah said...

Great accolades...to all the mother's in your life.

Anonymous said...

That was beautiful...even though I am not a mother I do appreciate the one I have in my life and I couldnt have explained their worth and importance more eloquently than you Sir Torrance

IntrospectiveGoddess

msladydeborah said...

Gee,

Reading this post made me feel really good about being a mother and a grandmother now.

It is good to know that in the age of babies mamas and daddies, that there are still folks who recognize parenting as one of the difficult yet rewarding roles in life.

Your flowers are beautiful!

Lovebabz said...

Thank you kindly for holding Mothers in such high regard. So many Mothers are often maligned for what we don't do that it is refreshing to be thought of in this manner.

The flowers are lovely!

Taryn "Skinny Genes" B. said...

This was nice :-) ... its the simple things a mother does, and yes being a parent is very hard. I wonder how my mother does it all.

Meikmeika said...

Beautiful Post...

The Jaded NYer said...

Aww, this was really sweet. All the mommas in your life should be proud :)

Brownsoul said...

now that's good stuff. hope you had a blessed mother's day.

Theresa said...

Sorry about that, didn't realize! :)

Jackie Edwards said...

"....it was ok for a man to be passionate, humble, confident and appreciative of all that he had". Say no more!! I really enjoyed this post and really verbalizes just how outstanding mothers are, selflessly, tirelessly, without agenda. They are without parallel.

vanessa quintor said...

this post restored a bit of lost hope i had in humanity. it is so lovely to hear you speak so passionately of parenthood as well as your relationship with your mother.

i read this one to my mother today and thought of you and all of them wild flowers.

this touched me and i'm no one's mother at all, but your tenderness is indeed your strength.

Vdizzle said...

That was absolutely wonderful! I have no other words.

Dusty said...

Beautiful and such a joy to read ;)

Thank you for writing this Torrance!

sasha said...

sweet post.
my son wont have a father either. they say that for most (i cannot say for certain) that a father's love is aquired with contact with the child. a womans soul is apart of that child. we are instantly in love with our children. from the first moment we feel them move in our bellies.

i dont want to seem bitter. my son's father has been gone since i said "im keeping it". to him, and to a lot of men (unfortunately) my son is out of sight out of mind. but it is a lot harder for woman to do that. it is a lot harder for mothers to turn their backs on their child. but it isnt impossible.

i hope that i will be able to teach my son how to value the women in his life, because they say its hard to do that when there isnt a man around to show a young man the apreciation of a woman, or what it looks like. but i have male family members who im sure will do a fabulous job.

great blog :D

professor said...

"although my son’s mom has never given me a fathers day card nor Christmas gift since we went our separate ways, and my daughters mother would not even call me last year on fathers day to let her daughter wish me such while I was in Quebec City, Quebec."...I was with you 100% until that...its like apologizing with a "but"...we do things from our heart...I've never gotten a gift or card, not even when I was with the sperm donor...but I really don't care...it was nice that you got them something, and I know it was from the heart...
but the rest was heart warming...happy mo-day to the strong women in your life...

One Man’s Opinion said...

I learn something new about you everytime I read one of your post, my brother. You are a very deep man. Mother's are the shit. I woke up on mother's day and texted everyone who I knew was a mother, a Happy Mother's day (that is encluding the people who work under me). I also treated my three sisters and my out to eat for Mother's day. Someday I wish to have enough money to treat a everywoman in my family to dinner (one year I did do this for breakfast), but that shit can break a nigger and you know it. Especially when they all have grown ass children and none of them offer to help pay, but all of them want to tag alone.

dejanae said...

good stuff man
appreciate what u have

Christina said...

Hi Sweetie, your post made me cry today but it also made me more brave. Yesterday my son and daughter tugged at my heart with the respect they showed their great grandmother. It let me know I'm doing something right, that's all I needed, my heart was so full:)

Kitty said...

You're so sweet. :) We used to eat something like milk toast sans the milk. I still make it for my son and my little cousins lol. Yummay. Oh those ghetto snacks. That's a whole 'nother post tho. Your mom sounds like a fab lady. You're blessed.

Aunt Jackie said...

black man

you touched my heart with this one.

MrsGrapevine said...

Tequila with Hot Sauce, now that's what I'm talking about. I love being a mother, and since I have two boys I feel extra prideful. I don't know, it's something about a mother's love for her boys. You know what I'm talking about.

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